If She Only Knew
by Jessica R Vance
Summary: This is a song fic! Yay! It's based on the song by 98 Degrees, and it's what James' thoughts might be if Jessie ever leaves Team Rocket.


If She Only Knew  
  
Inspirational Words By: 98 Degrees  
  
Story By: Jessica R Vance  
  
Summary: Based on a song by 98 Degrees, this story tells what James might think if Jessie ever left the team.  
  
Rating: G   
  
Disclaimer: Hey, I have something new to add that I don't own! I don't own Pokémon or 98 Degrees!  
  
Warning! This is the first thing I've ever written that doesn't have a happy ending! If you're one of those 'I only read it if they get together' Shippers, I don't suggest this one.  
  
P.S.- Don't ask me what Jessie's motive is for leaving, it just made a good plot point.  
  
If She Only Knew  
  
If she only knew  
What I knew, but couldn't say,  
  
'I love you, Jessie.' I thought as I watched her walk away. Jessie had decided to quit Team Rocket. I wanted to come, but she had told me she wanted to go on alone. She didn't want me anymore.  
  
If she could just see  
The part of me that I hid away,  
  
Maybe if I had told her. If I had told her how I feel, maybe she would've changed her mind. If, when she told me she was leaving, I had said, "No, Jessie, don't leave! I love you!" Would it have… no, probably not.  
  
If I could just hold her in my arms again  
And just say 'I love you'.  
  
I thought of all the times that I had the chance to tell her. Maiden's Peak after she saved me, up in the balloon, when it had seemed I saved her. So many chances, but no action.  
  
But she's gone away,   
Maybe she'd stay,  
If she only knew.  
  
I can't help but think that if I had just told her…  
  
If she could just feel   
What I feel here in my heart,  
  
Maybe she does feel the same way. And since I didn't tell her how *I* feel, she left. … No, she couldn't feel that way about me. She's too good for me.  
  
She'd know it was real,  
Pure and true right from the start.  
  
First day I met her, I knew I loved her. First time I looked into those sapphire eyes of hers, I knew.   
  
But I'm just a man who didn't understand  
What she was going through.  
  
I realize now that I didn't really know her. I knew very little about her past. Maybe that's what's wrong. She has some demons she can't tell me about.  
  
She's gone away.  
Maybe she'd stay   
If she only knew.  
  
I've still got that nagging feeling…  
  
And how, how did I let her get away?  
  
I'm such an imbecile.  
  
'Cuz love, love is so easy to feel,  
But the hardest thing to say.  
  
What's so hard about saying three little words? It's the simplest thing in the world to feel them, that's for sure. But when it comes time to *say* 'I love you,' you can't seem to force the words out of your mouth.  
  
If she could just see  
What I see when I close my eyes.  
  
I had always daydreamed about us being together. Every time I shut my eyes, I'd see us. Happily ever after… it just doesn't happen that way.  
  
All that I dream,  
Surely she would realize…  
  
Every single night, all my dreams were the same. Different plot every now and then, but the result was always the same. It was always about Jessie. Always.  
  
But like a fool I waited much too long  
To let her know the truth.  
  
Why did I wait so long? I could've told her! Why in the world did I put it off so long? I'm so stupid!  
  
She's gone away.  
Maybe she'd stay   
If she only knew.  
  
One little corner of my mind is still saying, "If you had just told her, she wouldn't have left!"  
  
Won't you tell me, tell me how  
How did I let her get away?  
  
This is the worst of my many mistakes.  
  
'Cause I guess that love,   
Love is so easy to feel,  
But the hardest thing to say.  
  
The emotion came so easily… the words to express it… they just… never came at all. But who needs fancy words? Why couldn't I have just been blunt and just told her the truth, flat out? It should've been easy!  
  
If she only knew  
What I knew but could not say.  
  
Why didn't I just tell her?  
  
If she could just see  
The part of me that I hid away.  
  
I know I could be the kind of guy she wants! I just needed to show it a little more…  
  
If I could just hold her in my arms again,  
And just say 'I love you'  
  
I'd give anything for her to come back. Anything.  
  
But she's gone away,  
Maybe she'd stay…  
If she only knew.  
  
Still that pesky thought that maybe, just maybe… but no…  
  
~*~  
  
Oh! ::cries:: ::blow nose:: That's so sad! Of course, we all know James' sneaking suspicion was true, right? Right!? JessicaVance@lovelornpoet.com Oh, and please don't flame me because it's a 98 Degrees song if you don't like 98 Degrees. This isn't about the song, it's about the story. Thank you!  



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